Wizards Computers Hilarity
by rachybaby
Summary: Hermione has been out helping Remus buy a computer, Harry reveals a secret that amuses Hermione while scarring Sirius and Remus for life.


**Wizards + Computers = Hilarity**

"Moony what in the name of Merlin's pink y-fronts is that?!" Remus gave his best friend a look that clearly said 'Merlin's what?!' and chose not to reply.

"It's called a computer Sirius" said Hermione gently, "It's a muggle invention that you can store files on electronically, send messages to friends the same way even though its not a quick as a telephone unless you use a program called MSN Messenger and also you can few files on what is called the internet" Sirius still looked confused, "I'll show you it's easier" she added when Sirius opened his mouth to speak again.

So finally when the computer was set up and Hermione had turned it on she proceeded to show Sirius and Remus how to use it.

"Wow, muggles are amazing!" whispered Sirius in awe, Hermione caught Remus' eye and they both grinned.

"Yeah, hey I'll show you where you can buy books from and have them delivered by post!" said Hermione and Remus grinned while Sirius just groaned. "Ok so it's w-w-w-dot-amazon-dot-co-dot-uk. Right so you…what the-?! HARRY! HARRY COME HERE QUICK!" she yelled while still staring at the computer screen.

Harry ran into the room a few seconds later, "What? What's wrong?"

Hermione pointed at the screen, "Care to explain?" Harry looked at the computer screen and grinned.

"Oh yeah I forgot to tell you that I'd written my story into a series of books and then gave them to a muggle woman in a café, told her that I'd had the idea for ages but didn't need the money and she said she'd happily take the books to publishers to try to sell them, they're quite good actually" Hermione, Sirius and Remus looked at him shocked. "What? They're good reads! You should see the fan fiction the fans write, some of its really good, here's I'll show you. Shift it squidge" Hermione scowled at the nickname but moved all the same and watched as Harry connected to a website called Fan . "You can read stories written by fans of any book, film, TV show, game, whatever on here. Ah here we go, Harry Potter…" Harry proceeded to show them all the different genres and character couples on the site.

Sirius and Remus were greatly amused at the different pairing from when they were at school, especially when it was a pairing that included Lily with someone who wasn't James until Harry showed them the Severus Snape/Lily Evans stories.

"That's sick" muttered Sirius.

"Its sick full stop! She's my mother!" Remus and Hermione laughed.

"Well you read them!" quipped Remus.

"Nothing over K+ then its just practically porn with swearing" Remus gave him a disbelieving look.

"You're kidding right?" Harry shook his head.

"No and some of the M rated is extremely graphic" said Harry while beginning to look sick.

"Do I want to ask how you found out?"

"No" Remus laughed, "Scared for life!" Harry nodded.

"So do these writers do any pairing?" asked Hermione.

"Yep, anybody with everybody"

"Even gay couples and lesbian couples?"

"Yeah you and Ginny's quite a good one!" grinned Harry and Hermione looked scandalised.

"WHAT?!" Harry laughed.

"Get over it; they do it to me as well!" said Harry.

"As in you with another man?" Harry nodded now going slightly green.

"Ew, wrong" whispered Hermione.

"Just a bit. Oh this will make you laugh though" Harry then proceed to choose the 'romance' genre, the 'M' rating, stories in English and of all length before choosing the names 'Sirius B' and 'Remus L' and the 'completed' status and clicked go. "Knock yourselves out" he mutter getting up.

"This is a joke right?" muttered Remus.

"Nope"

"How'd you find out?" asked Sirius.

"I was bored and decided to see how sick these people really are, here look at this one, its even got dad in it, he clicked on a story that had a summary stating that Sirius was in love with James and Remus and was dating both of them until they found out and he had to choose.

"Did you read it?"

"The first chapter and believe me, curiosity killed the cat!" Hermione threw her head back and laughed while Sirius and Remus gave Harry identical disgusted looks before looking at the computer screen and reading the first four lines before closing their eyes in horror. "Oh yeah it opens with some really raunchy sex before cooling down until the end of the chapter" Harry added.

"And you continued reading after those first lines why?"

"Like I said curiosity killed the cat" Hermione was in stitches.

"More like it turned him on" she giggled.

"Shut up! That's my dad this person's writing about!" protested Harry.

Hermione just laughed harder, "Yeah begging Sirius to fuck him harder!" she now had her arms wrapped around her stomach from laughing.

"That's just wrong" muttered Sirius.

"Keep reading" said Harry and against their better judgement they did until…

"I did what?!" exclaimed Sirius and this time Harry joined in Hermione's laughter.

"Told you".

"That is so wrong! If I ever try that in real life Rem, kill me!"

"Don't worry I will" muttered Remus.

"Oh what you complaining at? It's actually quite hot. GINNY COME HERE!" said Hermione with a wicked grin while sitting down on the chair and clicked to the next chapter causing all three men stare at her in horror while Ginny ran into the room.

**A/N: You like? Review! And I have no idea where this came from by the way it just did.**


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